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Loving Myself

I am extremely grateful to have found PSI Seminars.  I was at a very low point in my life when my father said to me, “I took this seminar this past weekend and I would really love for you to come to my graduation.”  Little did I know that this was the beginning to an incredible adventure.  All I can remember from the Graduation/Presentation was that it got me thinking…what more could I have in life, what did I want for myself, and why didn’t I already have it?

I was interested and curious enough to enroll on the spot.  My Basic Seminar was about a week later  in Orange County in August 2009.  I loved my experience and I was hungry for more!  Less than two weeks later I was up at High Valley Ranch for PSI 7, The Life Success Course.

The most important value I learned during that amazing month of August was to love myself.  It may sound silly, however I did not truly love myself before the Basic.  I appeared solid on the outside, yet inside I was torn to pieces.  I was lying to myself everyday thinking that I was happy with my life and choices I had made.  I was self-conscious about everything.  Whenever I would walk into a room, the only thing I could think about was what everyone else was thinking about me.  This crazy negative self-talk clouded my mind on a daily basis.  After PSI 7, the old me was no more.  I decided to live my life not worrying about others judgement, opinions, or beliefs.  I don’t recall where I heard this, yet it has stuck with me ever since; “What someone else thinks of me is none of my business.”  This is what I say to myself and all the negativity simply drifts away.  If ever I start to doubt my greatness I can hear those little voices that once were so familiar and now sound so foreign.  I speak louder than those voices with a greater belief in myself, I simply say an affirmation or proudly state my PLD (Pacesetter’s Leadership Dynamics) contract!  One of my favorite things to do is to look in the mirror and tell myself, “I love you.”

Now that I had finally found my confidence, I was ready to share myself with the world.  I went on to attend the very next available Women’s Leadership Seminar in October 2009.  WLS gave me an opportunity to explore how I viewed myself versus how others viewed me.  It was awesome to be able to receive feedback and support in a completely non-judgmental environment.  It was a time when I realized that my past, was not a reflection of my future.  I have a choice every moment to decide who I want to be and what I want to create.  I discovered that I am a woman of service.  I love to serve my community whether it be through service projects or volunteering my time with PSI.  To keep the positivity going, of course I signed up for the next Principia which was in September 2010.  To me, it was an experience of community and being with other like minded individuals.  Growing and developing relationships has been the most beneficial aspect of being apart of this community.

Last year, marked 3 years since I had started this journey.  I was finally ready to take myself on in a new and bigger way.  I wanted to staff one of the classes.  A good friend reminded me of Camp Choice, which I had aspired to staff ever since I first heard about it in 2009.  Somehow, I allowed life get in the way of me fulfilling that dream.  This was the perfect time for me.  I went to Camp Choice and I can honestly say it was one of the most amazing weeks of my life.  I met so many incredible people that I staffed with and also fell in love with all the wonderful children who made it possible.

After Camp Choice, I recognized that I wanted to get healthy.  My weight was something I always have struggled with and I decided that enough was enough.  I started a new healthy nutritious way of eating and also started an exercise plan.  Since then, I have released 57lbs and still continuing this great journey of health.  Not only do I have more energy to follow my passion of serving, I am increasing my self-worth along the way.  During that week I decided that staffing was my new favorite thing.  Although, I had re-audited the Basic Seminar almost a dozen times, how I viewed my worthiness was stopping me from taking it to the next level.  With inspiration from my Camp Choice buddy when I returned home, I staffed the first available Basic in my city, Orange County.  My staffing goal was to play PLD and the next team started that same month of August 2012.  I have staffed 5 Basic Seminars in the past year and I just returned from my second year at Camp Choice.  Believe it or not, this year’s Camp was even more amazing than last year!

I appreciate PSI Seminars for continuing to create world peace, one mind at a time.  I know my life would be completely different had I not found this community of support.  I know that this will continue to be the best thing I have ever done for myself.  PLD was a great way for me to see how I was using all the tools that had been provided during my journey.  I was able to see the value in loving myself and going after my dreams.  Without that belief in myself, I would have never started to go for my goals.  I went from never setting goals to now setting and achieving goals on a daily basis.  I love my life and all the people in it.  Staffing Camp Choice and the Basic for Kids, reaffirmed that my purpose in life is to inspire youth.  I love to nurture their spirits and support them to step into their power.  I feel that the friends I have made are like family, I always have someone to turn to.  No matter the situation I know I am never alone and that is the best feeling in the world.  I know that nothing can stop me from getting what I want.  My contract clearly states I am a confident, trusting, sexy woman fearlessly taking charge of my life now!  These powerful words guide me to be the best I can be and that is priceless.'

Courtney Smith

I am a confident, trusting, sexy woman fearlessly taking charge of my life now!


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